parentsong

Stories and thoughts from day to day life in the Bullard Family

Infant Reflux or Classic Colic? August 8, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories — parentsong @ 10:51 pm
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Once we were a few weeks into G’s life, we realized this baby was not going to be easy. He fussed and cried for most of the day and night. Once he calmed down at night, things got slightly easier. I still had trouble doing anything out of the house. I had to take him grocery shopping and occasionally to outings for our older child, B. I was known at the grocery store as the lady with the crying baby. Seriously. But I learned ways of calming him, mostly by holding him and keeping him happily fed. The problem was that he would spit up if I fed him too much. He pulled in his legs and squirmed through every nursing. He seemed as though he was in pain.

After we passed the 6-week mark, the time when babies generally calm down, I began to think we need an intervention. I had tried everything on my own that I could think of and had read about, but nothing seemed to work. After G’s 2 month check-up, we put him on Zantac. Our neighbor also had both of her children on this medication as infants and said it was “like magic.” Several other mothers told me they had their children on it, too. I was reluctant, but wanted to help my baby. After two weeks on the medicine, he seemed the same. Maybe he was a little more calm, but it was hard to say that it was the medication. It could have just been our perception- that’s how subtle it was.

I called the pediatrician to see if we could try Prilosec, a stronger medication for blocking acid reflux. Since this medication works in a different way, one would expect to see some change when transition from one to the next. We saw no difference, but gradually, G seemed to be calming (but still very subtle changes). Was it the medication? The pediatrician warned us not to stop the medication until he was sitting up on his own and more mobile. The reasoning was that people think that when the medicine starts working, you don’t need it anymore and that reflux tends to be less of a problem when babies are more vertical (i.e., sitting up on their own).

Around three months, we still weren’t convinced that G was suffering from acid reflux. He still spit up after almost every meal and I was still feeding him in small doses frequently through the day and night. He was still crying, but not quite as much. After about 4 weeks on Prilosec, we decided to stop the medicine, AMA (against medical advice). We gradually decreased the dose. We noticed G started having digested spit up: the kind with the little white bits in it. Up until now, he only spit up pure breast milk. Now that the acid was actually digesting his food, it changed a bit. He did not become more fussy, but continued on his normal curve toward improving.

How can you know if your baby is suffering from acid reflux or colic? Unless tests are performed, which they are generally not in this country, one can never really know. It is just treated with medicine (hence so many babies taking the medication). The more I learned about colic, the more I felt that this was G’s situation, especially since the medication did not make a huge difference. We also intuitively felt that it was more likely colic. I remember several times with my first child that people told me to trust the “mother instinct.” I could only trust my instinct after several weeks of carefully watching my son and learning about colic and acid reflux.

At the time, it felt like it would never end. I thought we would be stuck with a very difficult baby, but that is not the case now. Now we are just catching up on sleep, er, sort of.

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Sleep and the Post-Colic Baby July 5, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories,Parenting — parentsong @ 12:17 pm
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Colic is a funny thing. I have read loads about it since it appears that is what our son, Gabriel, was suffering from for the first three months of his life. Suffering? Maybe. It is hard to say if it is actual suffering or just not able to acclimate to his new world. The idea of the fourth trimester seems to ring so true for colicky babies. They just cannot calm down unless they are held, rocked, and given a steady noise, such as shhhing or white noise. Basically, put them back in the womb!

One thing that stands out to me from my reading adventures (online and through books) is that when the colic ends, you often have a overly-tired baby on your hands. Trying to get the baby to sleep is of utmost importance because up to this point, he or she has not learned a lick of how to do it on his or her own.

This was certainly true for us. Gabriel showed the classic symptoms of colic: crying for hours on end from about the second week of his life until about 13 or 14 weeks. It gradually got better, it wasn’t like he hit three months and BAM! no more crying. He eased his way out of it. To get through it, we did whatever worked, which included breaking our rule that the baby does not sleep in our bed. As a post-colic baby*, he still ends up in our bed for several hours a night and often awakens there. But the important thing is that he is happy.

I have treated his fourth month of life very much like I would treat a typical baby’s first month. We have not imposed any sleep schedule on him because in my mind, he has only just started being able to self-regulate and develop some natural sleep pattern. I just focused on helping him to get as much sleep as possible. At four months old, he takes 4-5 naps a day and spends 1-2 hours awake between the naps. At night, he is up around 4 times between 8:00 p.m. and 8:00 a.m. He averages about 13 hours of sleep in a 24-hour period. Much better than the 8-10 hours he was getting at the peak of the colic. He also eats NON-STOP. But that’s for another post.

So this is where we are. Where are we going? The therapist part of me has put together a list of questions to help me decide which route to take in sleep training. Our first, Briony, was sleep-trained at 9 months. After failed attempts using a few different methods, we ended up “Ferberizing” her, or a gradual extinction method. It took less than a week for her to learn to go to sleep on her own. Gabriel is a different person and will likely require a different approach. I’m exploring that right now.

*Post-colic baby: The state of being for a baby emerging from colic, usually the first 6-9 weeks following the colic spell. I made up this definition, but it makes sense to me.

 

Recovering from Colic June 14, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories,Parenting — parentsong @ 9:30 pm
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Peaceful napping, mostly when not in a crib

I think the “worst” is over. Though, apparently, when raising children, things don’t get harder or easier, they just change. While there are many challenges of parenting I expect, things such as sleep deprivation and having to eat standing up or use only one hand for everything because the baby cannot be set down, there are some things that I do not like to be challenged by. Having a baby spitting up constantly and crying for many hours of the day is not fun. I just wanted to get through it. And we have. Now, we have a very happy, alert, spunky 3 ½ month old.

The problem now is that sleep is still a major issue. I have many books on sleep in infants and I understand how it works. Weissbluth is the only author I have read that acknowledges the effect colic has on the infant developing healthy sleeping habits. I believe that parents can really make or break a child’s ability to sleep well.

Happy most of the time, now!

I want to help our child learn to sleep. He currently wakes every 30 to 45 minutes from a nap and every hour to three hours in the night. This says to me that he cannot make it through natural arousals that occur in all sleep. We adults have learned how to stay asleep through having to move or adjust in our sleep. We don’t wake up full of vigor in the middle of the night because we were uncomfortable or had an itch or heard a car door shut. We mostly remain unconscious of it and carry on sleeping. By 12 to 16 weeks, infants have the ability to do the same thing. Hmmm, I guess we are dealing with a habit at this point.

While I am not quite ready to jump into hard-core sleep training just yet, we are devising a sort of plan to assist our child in getting the gist of sleeping. I’ll lay it out in another post, and hopefully report great things as time goes on.

 

Our Sweet Little Angel (Ha!) April 16, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories — parentsong @ 2:14 pm
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I knew that this baby was quite spunky from the way he behaved in the womb. Always kicking, no, thrashing about for several hours every night. He came into this world with a bang and hasn’t let up since. This boy has been nursing non-stop since he was born. I mean, he can go four hours, but that has only happened twice. Usually he will nurse every 30 minutes for about 8 hours a day. The rest of the time it is every 1-2 hours.

Now, they aren’t long, drawn out nursing sessions. He is finished after about five minutes. He has learned not to take too much at a time because he spits it all back up. He used to lose the whole “meal” several times a day. We figured out how to deal with the spitting up (thanks to Dr. Sears’ suggestions) and so that is less of an issue. Although, I am still changing my outfit (yes, the entire thing) one to three times a day.

For many babies, spitting up causes a weight gain problem. Not with this guy. He is, as of today, 14 lbs 12 oz. Okay, seven weeks and on our way to 6-9 month clothing!

Sleeping is also a big issue. Since he nurses so much, he sleeps very little. I mean, sometimes nine hours in a 24-hour period. He averages just under 12. For a newborn, that is very low. So he’s active, no problem, right? Wrong. Most of his waking time, if not nursing, he is crying. Loudly. Like an ambulance driving right through your living room. So, is something wrong with him? I don’t know.

Enter the medications: We started Zantac (against our wishes) with the hope of helping him be in less pain. His crying was often related to feeding, so he was diagnosed with reflux, or GER. After two weeks and no change, we have switched him to Prilosec, which is supposed to be more effective. Still, not a whole lot of difference. He may just be very vocal, or grow out of it eventually like so many babies do.

So how are we coping? More to come on that. I’ll write that bit as soon as I have another few minutes here and there to actually sit and use both of my hands!

 

Gabriel’s First Five Days March 2, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories — parentsong @ 9:56 pm
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As with many new additions, the first few days are always the most surreal. This thing is here that wasn’t before and everything has been a little different since then. I mean, life goes on and we try to keep things as normal as possible, but things are different. And exciting!

When Briony was born, it was my favorite story to tell. We were invited back to our Bradley class to share the story of her birth with the next class. It was so nice to share the story. Now we have Gabriel’s story. Hardly a typical birth story; and certainly one that Nick was not expecting (at least I don’t recall him brushing up on how to deliver a baby prior to the birth). It has taken me a few days just to process what happened. It was so fast and unexpected. During labor, I thought about getting the music out and filling the diffuser with my essential oils, but all I could do was tell Nick to keep talking to me. And then suddenly the baby was born.

Day One

At first he was so calm and sleepy; completely the opposite of Briony when she was first born. He nursed wonderfully and everything seemed way too easy. I was still feeling pretty good after such a short labor, and still pretty high on hormones. Poor guy was pretty beat-up from the fast birth. That must have also made him pretty exhausted.

 

Day Two

By day two he had caught the Bullard fever: strong-willed, vocal and not afraid to tell us how he was feeling. It became a non-stop nursing marathon and suddenly I felt very exhausted. Having not slept much was also starting to wear on us. We still didn’t have a name, so I wasn’t calling him anything.

Day Three

Day three was more of the same, except that we got news at the doctor visit that he had very high levels of bilirubin and would have to be tested. You can catch that exciting story on another post, William Rubin.

Day Four

On day four, we finally decided on a name, which was such a relief. I could finally call him something that was going to stick!  I was finally getting into the nursing schedule (being non-stop), though now that I had milk, it was a constant dance between nursing and changing these itty bitty diapers and little time for sleep. For some reason, it wasn’t all that stressful. Perhaps because we had already been through it before and when sleep deprivation and exhaustion is expected, it is easier to cope with.

Day Five

Day five leaves me in a state of complete happiness. First of all, I have been able to rest, which has been key. Nick has really taken over running the house and looking after Briony. He offers full service meals in bed and special treats like fresh, toasty bread smothered in Nutella. Briony pops in frequently, excited to see “brother baby.” She’s still working on his name, which usually comes out like “Gagabul” or  “Bowaga.” It is so fun to see how she has really welcomed him.

 

What’s in a Name?

Filed under: Gabriel Stories — parentsong @ 11:39 am
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The adventure of naming. It seems so easy: pick a name you like and apply it to your child or pet or car, whatever you are naming. We had Briony’s name picked out quite a while before she was born. Once we decided that yes, we would call her Briony, that was it. There was no turning back. Even though she hadn’t even been born yet, this is what we would call her. We loved it and still do. It’s different, but not too different.

Coming up with a name when you don’t know the sex of the baby in advance posed too great of a challenge for either of us to take on. We found a few girl’s names we liked and agonized over boy’s names. To take the easy way out, we decided that it would be best to wait to see the baby before we determine what we will call him or her. Nothing like a healthy dose of procrastination!

Then he was born: a boy. Oh no! We have to come up with a boy’s name! We didn’t really LOVE any boy names the way we love the name Briony. We considered names such as Owen, Ellis, Benjamin, Ramsay, Ian (Nick’s middle name), Swithin (as in St. Swithin, which means nothing to Americans), and Obie. I started calling him Obie in case we named him Owen or Oliver or Orville. It just never felt right.

At 4 a.m. on Saturday morning, Nick came to me and said “what about the name Gabriel?” I like Gabriel, but it was 4 a.m. Let’s not make any rash decisions here. So we slept on it. After further discussion the next morning, we finally decided. Yes, Gabriel it is. Gabriel Ian. I think he looks like a Gabriel.

 

William Rubin March 1, 2011

Filed under: Gabriel Stories — parentsong @ 11:21 pm
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When Nick took the baby to the pediatrician two days after he was born, I was expecting him to be gone for about an hour. Then he called me saying he had to take the baby to the hospital for tests because he appeared to have very high bilirubin levels (jaundice).  Many babies have jaundice when they are born, but sometimes it needs action.

The tests revealed a bilirubin level of 18.3, apparently rather high, as 22 can call for hospitalization. After a little back and forth with the pediatrician, we had ordered the biliblanket to be delivered by a medical supply company. The baby was to be on this blue light over night and get tested again in the morning.

Of course, we didn’t get to the lab until after they closed. I called the pediatrician and she said keep him on the light as much as possible. We also had him in the sunshine for a good hour two days in a row. So the poor babe had to sleep with this plastic glowing paddle thing in his back. This was not fun for me either, trying to nurse him and change him all the time.

We still didn’t have a name for the baby, so Nick suggested William Rubin, since his bilirubin levels were so high. Ha ha, of course Nick can keep his sense of humor despite being terribly sleep deprived and fighting a cold.

Fortunately, by Monday morning he was fine. The pediatrician said we would not have to have him tested again. Thanks to about 40 hours on the glowing blue light and lots of nursing!